| Woman married a non-committer, now wonders if he will ever change. Dr Luv gives advice. Non-committer must seek help for himself. No one can be changed without wanting to change. | Dr. Luv |
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| Letter Non-Committer in Marriage Dear Dr. Luv, Eight months ago I married a commitphobe. After reading your articles on-line on the subject click (click here), I am beginning to see what has caused me such confusion.I am, however, interested in anything I can get on the subject, and want to talk to someone, as this has been devastating. What causes it? Can it be helped? Terri This column is for educational and
entertainment purposes. The advice given is merely my thoughts. Professional advice should
be sought before or snail mail to
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Reply from Dr. Luv Dear Terri, Yes, it can be helped but only if the person wants to get help and will do the required work to change. Most often the person who is non-committal doesn't want help or is unwilling to do the work necessary. These people just drive those who love them crazy. Your husband can seek professional help from a good counselor. He should interview several by phone and find out how they work and their fees. If he goes to one and counseling doesn't help in three to six months, he should find another counselor. As for you, don't get stuck trying to fix your partner; it is up to him to fix himself. This can go on and on--sometime for years--until someone wakes up and finally
says, "I have Time is ticking so get going. Good Luck and God Bless, |
